The way the light is coming in to my office, the reflection in my water bottle makes it look like the rainbow starts right outside my window.

I’ve been really moved by the number of PMs, emails, Facebook and LJ messages I’ve received. I was really surprised that a few of the triathletes (Can we call ourselves that?) cried reading I gave up the prize. I’ve gotten some really… incredibly special PMs from people about how much the Triathlon meant to them (like seriously wow PMs). Thanks again to everyone who has been so, so incredibly supportive. It really means a lot to me.

I feel like it’s important to state that I didn’t give up first place; I gave up the prize. Those votes are mine and I earned them fairly, even if I am empty-handed in terms of dolly loot. :) I’m okay. At the end of the day I’m still coming away with this from more than I came in with because I’ve gotten to know some really awesome people.

I’m probably not going to be too visible on DoA for a bit because I’m not exactly in love with the community right now… but I’m still here. I have a lot of actual forum admin and coding stuff to catch up on. The other mods have been awesomely handling everything as though nothing unusual was happening (ha, I know they don’t even miss me), but I need to get back to doing stuff. I’ll be working on casting Inkling (The normalskin I cast over the weekend is totally to die for. It’s practically edible.) and then I’m on to sculpting something new. I haven’t decided if it will be an SD-sized head or a wirey, distended mini boy or a companion boy for Inkling. Whatever it is, I’m sure I’ll hate it in three months as much as or more than I hate Inkling. ;) I’ll also be working on losing some weight. Yikes.

Unrelated, I totally love my Williams and I can’t wait to repaint his drag queen lips. <3

It’s really just not worth it. I guess the part that hurts and frustrates me the most is that I did win fairly and I took pains to make sure that everything was even, anonymous, and unbiased… and I had the votes verified by other people. We pretty much came up with the contest challenges on the fly, usually while getting ready for work and going “Oh, shit. Next leg is tomorrow. What should we post?” I am giving up something that I did earn, and I think that my work shows that I won fairly. I’m crushed, but I suppose if I’m going to be thoroughly honest I am darkly unsurprised. I think the most hurtful part is that people think I would barter my integrity for a doll. Sorry, I value myself more than that.

It’s also frustrating that it wasn’t the people who were actually involved in the competition who had a problem with it, but they’re the ones being penalized because I’ll be damned if I’m organizing any other events for DoA. If we have them, it’s going to be other admins soliciting prizes and running things. I am DONE.

I really like my entries, though… so I want to post the pics I’ve been holding back. :)

This weekend seems so busy already, even though I had Friday off.

I have been working on casting Inkling. I have all of prototype Inkling ready to sand and finish, aside from needing to recast one of the calves. I don’t know what’s up, but for some reason I have miscast that piece a few times now because I’m not putting in enough resin. I think perhaps it needs a thicker vent, maybe it’s getting a bubble that’s making me think it’s full? The mold isn’t leaking. I want prototype Inkling to be on her way by next weekend so I can get this party started. So far prototype Inkling has one tan calf that was an extra when I cast Inkling #1 for Dezarii.

I’m also working on casting a NS Inkling…. the color is really pretty. I have to say that I really love the translucence of this resin. I did a test for the color of the next Inkling (pale blue) and it turned out really, really pretty. I’m eager to cast those pieces. After blue, I have another tan… then the preorder pieces are all cast. After that I’ll do Mandy’s tan with red pearl and my own pearly acid green, if the molds hold up.

So far I have 3 little Ziplock baggies of Inklings to finish and string. Wheeeee. Hopefully by the end of tomorrow, there will be 4 and a half. :) The glow in the dark Inkling is spoken for, but I’m not sure of the fate of the plain blue pearl. I think I may customize her and auction her. I’ll figure it out once the preorder dolls are completed.

I am restless today. I have some Inkling bits curing in the pot that I can’t touch for another hour. I want to go take pics of Shai and Cog in my Triathlon set, but I know I won’t be able to post them for a few days anyway so I sort of feel blah about it…

I need to post stuff for sale…

I also need to get the order form up for the Pewter Homme Fer. -_-; I don’t feeeeeeeeel like it though. *grumps around*

I want a rare, deliciously salted steak.

Actually, I think I just want to chew on a raw steak like a dog.

I think there is something crucial missing in my diet.

I’m not impressed with the Dragon Skin silicone at all. It is tearing already after only about 4 casts. I postcured it again, and I’m going to be really vigilant with the mold release… I am really angry, though, as I was hoping to get 20-30 casts out of this mold and I feel like Ill be lucky to make it to ten.

Casting again this weekend.

I have pieces for two Inklings that are not what I was trying to make. One is an imperfect cast (the blue with glow in the dark) and the other is a good cast in the wrong color (too translucent, medium blue pearly). I’ll finish both up after I finish the preorder dolls, then I’ll post up pictures to rehome them. I wonder if I have enough magnets for the off-casts? Maybe I need to order more.

These are the glow faces in the light. See, there is some odd coloration where the glow particles sank… and the glitter sank too.

This is them in the dark. I like that the expressions seem to be very clear. I still wish that the glow particles would stay suspended. However, more research is making me think that I would need a very quick-setting resin to make it work. I might experiment in the future assuming that these molds live long enough. LOL, or I could work with the sinking particles and make an Inkling with only a glowing ass, more like a real firefly. ;)

This is the pearly translucent blue Inkling. Her sleeping face is about the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. I think the sleeping plate is my favorite in general though.

I’m looking into an eyemaker for 4mm eyes… but they’re a little evasive on pricing. Oh well. I’m not in a huge rush. I’m sort of looking ahead for when we do the real production casting, since I’ll need to source eyes and wigs. I should also look into wigmakers since there aren’t a huge number of options in 3 inch.

I’ve been working a lot on my DoA Triathlon entries and casting/seasoning my molds, but I don’t really know where where I’ve been mentally this month. If I owe you an email/PM/drawing etc., I promise I will catch up soon.

Mandy and I entered Almost Doll just for the hell of it… mostly because I wanted to do a faceup on a human and make resin rose jewelry in human scale. It’s really huge.

Mandy’ll be posting her pics… which are cooler. I liked how I painted her eyelashes and did her lips. Her jewelry also was way better.

I did a test this morning with a clear resin + opaque pigment and a couple exciting additives – namely, pearl powder, glitter, and glow-in-the-dark powder. It was 33% successful, which is to say that the pearl powder effect was really lovely. However, both the glow-in-the-dark powder and glitter sank to the bottom and made it so that the color is not even (nor is the glow).

That said, the more I look at the pieces, the more I like them. Because of the orientation of the faceplates in the mold, the glow powder settled along the chin, mouth, bottom of the nose, eyelid, and brow ridge. The effect in the dark is like Inkling has put a flashlight under her chin in classic ghost story fashion. The blue is darker than I had intended because the pigment is so strong and I am not mixing huge amounts of resin.

Tomorrow I try again on normal colors. Woo-hoo. I am getting better at putting my molds together with the mother shells so that the seams aren’t too big.

Unrelated, the ghetto neighbors across the street have upped the ante in terms of being annoying – they have built a skateboard ramp in their driveway, making it the cool hangout for every irritating little emokid and wannabe babythug in the neighborhood. I’ve been listening to them skating back and forth on this echoing, rickey thing, listening to crappy music, for probably the last three hours. They’re the only neighbors like this; we have a very quiet, pleasant little neighborhood. But they’ve got probably 10 trashy people living in an 800 square foot house and they’ve had two 3am domestic disputes this summer that have ended with the cops being called.

I am so lucky for everything I have.
I love my life and everyone in it. <3

If I haven’t told you lately that I love you, please know that I do.

Superfail day in the casting department. I just wasted a LOT of resin. And I made a mess. Fuck.